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قراءة كتاب Mr. Punch in Bohemia
تنويه: تعرض هنا نبذة من اول ١٠ صفحات فقط من الكتاب الالكتروني، لقراءة الكتاب كاملا اضغط على الزر “اشتر الآن"
should want so many of these, but we believe he is under the impression that by collecting a million of them he will be able to get a child into some hospital.
Of course in these enlightened days it is illegal to shoot editors, while to destroy their young is tantamount to murder.
Country Cousin (looking at Index of R. A. Catalogue). "Uncle, what does 1, 3, 6, 8, after a man's name, mean?"
Uncle (who has been dragged there much against his will). "Eh! What? 1, 3——Oh, Telephone number!"
In the Artist's Room.—Potztausend. "My friend, it is kolossal! most remark-worthy! You remind me on Rubinstein; but you are better as he." Pianist (pleased). "Indeed! How?" Potztausend. "In de bersbiration. My friend Rubinstein could never bersbire so moch!"
Brothers in Art.—New Arrival. "What should I charge for teaching ze pianoforte?" Old Stager. "Oh, I don't know." N. A. "Vell, tell me vot you charge." O. S. "I charge five guineas a lesson." N. A. "Himmel! how many pupils have you got?" O. S. "Oh, I have no pupils!"
A DIVISION OF LABOUR
["Journalism.—Gentleman (barrister) offers furnished bedroom in comfortable, cheerful chambers in Temple in return for equivalent journalistic assistance, &c."—Times.]
The "equivalent" is rather a nice point. Mr. Punch suggests for other gentlemen barristers the following table of equivalence:—
| 1 furnished bedroom. | = | 1 introduction (by letter) to sub-editor of daily paper. |
| 1 furnished bedroom with use of bath. | = | 1 introduction (personal) to sub-editor. |
| 1 bed-sitting-room. | = | 1 introduction and interview (five minutes guaranteed) with editor. |
| 2 furnished rooms. | = | 1 lunch (cold) with Dr. Robertson Nicoll. |
| 2 furnished rooms, with use of bath. | = | 1 lunch (hot) with Dr. Nicoll and Claudius Clear. |
| 1 furnished flat, with all modern conveniences, electric light, trams to the corner, &c. | = | 1 bridge night with Lord Northcliffe, Sir George Newnes, and Mr. C. A. Pearson. |
When he's regularly in the swing.
